Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain


I am :
Babyslime (Babs). Photographer. Blogger. Activist. Mother of four. Wife, ten years. Disabled. Queer. Moderately interesting.

I like :
Knitting. Blogging. Learning. Feminism. Sex. Photography. Birth. Sometimes all at once.

 

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www.babyslime-blog.com
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20th June 2012

Imagine you’re at a party. A guy offers you a drink. You say no. He says “Come on, one drink!” You say “no thanks.” Later, he brings you a soda. “I know you said you didn’t want a drink, but I was getting one for myself and you looked thirsty.” For you to refuse at this point makes you the asshole. He’s just being nice, right? Predators use the social contract and our own good hearts and fear of being rude against us. If you drink the drink, you’re teaching him that it just takes a little persistence on his part to overcome your “no.” If you say “Really, I appreciate it, but no thanks” and put the drink down and walk away from it, you’re the one who looks rude in that moment. But the fact is, you didn’t ask for the drink and you don’t want the drink and you don’t have to drink it just to make some guy feel validated.
—

The art of “no,” continued: Saying no when you’ve already said yes. « CaptainAwkward.com

I love this post SO MUCH. 

(via heavenearthandhoratio)

Predators use the social contract and our own good hearts and fear of being rude against us.  !!!This. This is why I don’t trip off of making a scene. It might just save my life.

(via newmodelminority)

Source: captainawkward.com

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